"Aut virum aut murum oportet mulierem habere" (a woman ought to have either a husband or a wall)
So pull the pink and yellow tones from my blushing skin,
and with a brush, wed them to warm Barcelona walls;
I will be her bright bride
until the Spanish sun peels our paint, swallows our brick back
into the mountain,
and migrating swallows cool us with their passing blue shadows
as they remind us how everything grows
in shifts of breaking eggs and bleaching bones.
Turning, and turning, and turning,
together,
the seasons slice us into sand
and sigh us down to that Mediterranean coast,
where we glow white and wet with the same moonlit
a sea of houses comes rolling in
rusty roofs bending
breaking, crashing
shingles popping like fireworks
(expressing their independence, they die)
while you and I
(nothing more than genetic flotsam, now)
turn our eyes from a shattered-glass snowfall
and dream of the winters of our youth
this will be the end of days
...
this will be clouds folding into the earth
thunderstorms growling from foxholes
rain tumbling from rivers
as a clumsy conflagration stumbles into our skin
stealing our silhouettes
painting our ghosts on walls
(oh, had only we learned such passive resistance)
as you and I
(only numbers and figures, we know)
I have carved a route through
convoluted (be)causeways
(just)express(ing myself)ways
and subtle by(the)ways
stolen signposts
you let fall
from your soliloquies
yet I am not sure
whether I stumbled into this bare, undulating crossroad
one hundred
or one thousand miles ago
for you keep your scale hidden
beneath face-down photographs
within journal entries
and underneath loose floorboards
...
I wonder if I have traveled anywhere at all
dead cells flake away from my touch
your indulgent fingers twist into my hair
feeding me stories of Pessinus
and allowing me to believe
that I have transformed you
but you are ten
I was like one of those music box ballerinas. I moved my limbs stiffly in practiced, predictable gestures along an imaginary track as I walked from the end of my register, behind the conveyer belt, and into my little cashier box walls made of grocery bags to the left, register keyboard in front, and computer screen and register drawer to the right. In the background, tired old nineties and eighties pop songs echoed over and over through the grocery store aisles.
My painted, plastic smile greeted a cu
how are you today?
in between
red lasers and barcodes
we were waking on a Tuesday morning
or, rather
hurling our hands
to crash languidly against
distasteful reminders of closets, curling irons, and coffee
we stitched a selvage
counting threads and individual skin cells
leading the needles in our nerve endings
with smeary fingerprints and curling toes
as we invented words to drown out the morning
within a snapped-open canvas bag
and the clunk of cans in the bottom
we were slithering into nylon skins
temporarily joining two halves
with plastic and grinning teeth
mocking the thunder,
a disgruntled polyester
II.
six guitar strings that whirred
under your hands
like sweet mosquito wings
seeking my blood
and that heart that bore it
III.
one shoe swallowed somewhere
below the water-rafting bridge;
the movements traced
by our joyous limbs
stitched
into its flailing, free laces
IV.
eight cassettes that buzzed
through steel wool speakers
in their scratchy eighties' voices
as our car rolled down
puzzle-lines of scenic summer;
each mile allotted us
one thousand words
V.
not once
have we pretended
to have one another
completely deciphered
VI.
three loads of laundry
that flapped on humid cords of June
as we threaded our to
When I die, I want
my bones to burn
and dance with tar
in the funeral pyre
heart. I will crack
with laughter and
blacken like all of
those transient stars
we connected like hands.
With my glowing
marrow, pitch, tar
and other content
(like the first letters
you ever sent to me
and the screw in my
knee I earned when
we learned to dive from
those cliffs like sea falcons)
I will be reborn.
One day I will live
as the signature of
a letter, or the curl
of an eyelash in a
portrait drawn for
a lover, or a memo
spreading softly into
the lines of your skin.
I will live on forever.
when she
sighs
she tastes fire and
betelgeuse ribs creak with an overload of hydrogen, expanding
until she splinters
into scattered consonants and vowels
for a moment
she could overwhelm galaxies
if she would believe she is more
than degenerate matter
...
although she can be viewed by the naked I,
her core collapsed long ago
and it seems I am living on borrowed light
...
but when she
smiles
breathing in swirling infrared tendrils
of tarnished c